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  • Writer's pictureFr. Guillermo A. Arboleda

Funeral Program for Bette C. Milledge (1931-2023)


Burial Office & Holy Eucharist for

Bette Conner Milledge (1931-2023)

May 27, 2023 at 11:00 a.m.


Today's Ministers: The Rev. Guillermo A. Arboleda, Rector; The Rev. Ella Roundtree-Davis, Deacon; Ms. Beryl C. Dandy, Music Director; Ms. C. Toni Blue, Verger


Watch the Livestream at www.Facebook.com/StMattSav/Live/



The Holy Eucharist: Rite II

The people's responses are written in black italics.

Unspoken instructions are written in red italics.



The Burial of the Dead



Prelude



Welcome from the Rector



The Opening Anthem

[BCP, p. 491 / Hymn S-381]


I am Resurrection and I am Life, says the Lord. Whoever has faith in me shall have life, even though she die. And everyone who has life, and has committed herself to me in faith, shall not die for ever.


As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives and that at the last he will stand upon the earth. After my awaking, he will raise me up; and in my body I shall see God. I myself shall see, and my eyes behold him who is my friend and not a stranger.


For none of us has life in herself, and none becomes her own master when she dies. For if we have life, we are alive in the Lord, and if we die, we die in the Lord. So, then, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's possession.


Happy from now on are those who die in the Lord! So it is, says the Spirit, for they rest from their labors.


[Words: Public Domain. Music: Mode 8 antiphon melody; adapt. Bruce E. Ford © 1985 Bruce E. Ford, Church Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved.]



The Collect of the Day

[BCP, p. 493]


The Lord be with you.

And also with you.

Let us pray:


O God, who by the glorious resurrection of your Son Jesus Christ destroyed death, and brought life and immortality to light: Grant that your servant Bette, being raised with him, may know the strength of his presence, and rejoice in his eternal glory; who with you and the Holy Spirit lives and reigns, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.



A Reading from the Book of Proverbs (3:1-12)


1 My child, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments; 2 for length of days and years of life and abundant welfare they will give you.

3 Do not let loyalty and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. 4 So you will find favor and good repute in the sight of God and of people.

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. 6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. 7 Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. 8 It will be a healing for your flesh and a refreshment for your body.

9 Honor the Lord with your substance and with the first fruits of all your produce; 10 then your barns will be filled with plenty, and your vats will be bursting with wine.

11 My child, do not despise the Lord’s discipline or be weary of his reproof, 12 for the Lord reproves the one he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights.


The Word of the Lord.

Thanks be to God.



A Reading from Psalm 23 (King James Version)


1 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.



LEV #218: Jesus Loves Me


1 Jesus loves me! this I know, For the bible tells me so; Little ones to Him belong; They are weak but He is strong.


Refrain: Yes, Jesus loves me, Yes, Jesus loves me, Yes, Jesus loves me, The bible tells me so.


2 Jesus loves me! He who died, Heaven’s gate to open wide; He will wash away my sin, Let His little child come in. [Refrain]


3 Jesus take this heart of mine, Make it pure and wholly thine; On the cross you died for me, I will try to live for thee. [Refrain]


[Words: Traditional, Anne B. Warner, Public Domain. Music: William B. Bradbury, Public Domain. Reprinted with permission under ONE LICENSE #84002. All rights reserved.]



The Holy Gospel of Our Lord Jesus Christ according to John (10:11-16)

Glory to you, Lord Christ.


11 “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. 12 The hired hand, who is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and runs away—and the wolf snatches them and scatters them. 13 The hired hand runs away because a hired hand does not care for the sheep. 14 I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, 15 just as the Father knows me and I know the Father. And I lay down my life for the sheep. 16 I have other sheep that do not belong to this fold. I must bring them also, and they will listen to my voice. So there will be one flock, one shepherd.


The Gospel of the Lord.

Praise to you, Lord Christ.



The Sermon

by The Rev. Guillermo A. Arboleda, Rector



The Apostles’ Creed

[BCP, p. 496]


In the assurance of eternal life given at Baptism, let us proclaim our faith and say,


I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth.


I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord. He was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and born of the Virgin Mary. He suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried. He descended to the dead. On the third day he rose again. He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father. He will come again to judge the living and the dead.


I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen.



Prayers for the Departed

[BCP, p. 497]


For our sister Bette, let us pray to our Lord Jesus Christ who said, "I am Resurrection and I am Life."


Lord, you consoled your friends Martha and Mary in their distress; draw near to us who mourn for Bette, and dry the tears of those who weep. Hear us, Lord.


You wept at the grave of Lazarus, your friend; comfort us in our sorrow. Hear us, Lord.


You raised the dead to life; give to our sister eternal life. Hear us, Lord.


You promised paradise to the thief who repented; bring our sister to the joys of heaven. Hear us, Lord.


Our sister was washed in Baptism and anointed with the Holy Spirit; give her fellowship with all your saints. Hear us, Lord.


She was nourished with your Body and Blood; grant her a place at the table in your heavenly kingdom. Hear us, Lord.


Comfort us in our sorrows at the death of our sister; let our faith be our consolation, and eternal life our hope.


The Celebrant concludes with the following prayer:

Lord Jesus Christ, we commend to you our sister Bette, who was reborn by water and the Spirit in Holy Baptism. Grant that her death may recall to us your victory over death, and be an occasion for us to renew our trust in your Father's love. Give us, we pray, the faith to follow where you have led the way; and where you live and reign with the Father and the Holy Spirit, to the ages of ages. Amen.



The Peace

[BCP, p. 360]


The peace of the Lord be always with you.

And also with you.



The Offertory

[BCP, p. 376]


Notes About Holy Communion:

  • All baptized Christians, from any church or denomination and of any age, are welcome to receive Communion in this church.

  • Please remain in your pews during the distribution of Communion; the minister(s) will come to serve you where you are.

  • As the minister approaches you with the bread (Body of Christ), extend your hands with palms open and facing up. The customary response to the minister's words is "Amen."

  • You may eat the bread alone. But if you wish to receive the wine (Blood of Christ), give your bread to the second minister, who will dip it in the wine and place it on your tongue.

  • If you or someone in your care is unbaptized or would prefer not to receive Communion for any reason, they should cross their arms over their chest. This signifies to the priest that they wish to receive a blessing instead.


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"Walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself for us, an offering and sacrifice to God." [Ephesians 5:2]



LEV #106: Precious Lord, Take My Hand

[Solo by M. Idella Jones]


1. Precious Lord, take my hand

Lead me on, let me stand

I am tired, I am weak, I am worn

Through the storm, through the night

Lead me on to the light

Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home


2. When my way grows drear precious Lord linger near

When my light is almost gone

Hear my cry, hear my call

Hold my hand lest I fall

Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home


3. When the darkness appears and the night draws near

And the day is past and gone

At the river I stand

Guide my feet, hold my hand

Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home


[Words and Music: Thomas A. Dorsey © 1940 Unichappell Music, Inc. Reprinted with permission under ONE LICENSE #1044278. All rights reserved.]



Praise God From Whom All Blessings Flow (Law)


Praise God, Praise God, Praise God!

Praise God, from whom all blessings flow;

Circling through earth so all may grow

Vanquishing fear so all may give

Widening grace so all may live

Amen.

[Words: Eric H. F. Law, Copyright © 2015 Eric H. F. Law. Music: Old 100th, attributed to Louis Bourgeois, Public Domain. Reprinted with permission from Kaleidoscope Institute. All rights reserved.]



Eucharistic Prayer A

[BCP, p. 361]


The Lord be with you.

And also with you.

Lift up your hearts.

We lift them to the Lord.

Let us give thanks to the Lord our God.

It is right to give him thanks and praise.


It is right, and a good and joyful thing, always and everywhere to give thanks to you, Father Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth.


Through Jesus Christ our Lord; who rose victorious from the dead, and comforts us with the blessed hope of everlasting life. For to your faithful people, O Lord, life is changed, not ended; and when our mortal body lies in death, there is prepared for us a dwelling place eternal in the heavens.


Therefore we praise you, joining our voices with Angels and Archangels and with all the company of heaven, who forever sing this hymn to proclaim the glory of your Name:


LEV #255:

Holy, holy, holy, holy, holy Lord God of hosts

Heaven and earth are filled with your glory

Hosanna in the highest.

Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord, of the Lord.

Hosanna in the highest, hosanna in the highest.


[Music: Grayson Warren Brown, A Mass for Soulful People, Copyright © 1979 North American Liturgy Resources, Published by OCP. Reprinted with permission under ONE LICENSE #83420. All rights reserved.]


The people stand or kneel.


Holy and gracious Father: In your infinite love you made us for yourself, and, when we had fallen into sin and become subject to evil and death, you, in your mercy, sent Jesus Christ, your only and eternal Son, to share our human nature, to live and die as one of us, to reconcile us to you, the God and Father of all.


He stretched out his arms upon the cross, and offered himself, in obedience to your will, a perfect sacrifice for the whole world.


On the night he was handed over to suffering and death, our Lord Jesus Christ took bread; and when he had given thanks to you, he broke it, and gave it to his disciples, and said, "Take, eat: This is my Body, which is given for you. Do this for the remembrance of me."


After supper he took the cup of wine; and when he had given thanks, he gave it to them, and said, "Drink this, all of you: This is my Blood of the new Covenant, which is shed for you and for many for the forgiveness of sins. Whenever you drink it, do this for the remembrance of me."


Therefore we proclaim the mystery of faith:

Christ has died.

Christ is risen.

Christ will come again.


We celebrate the memorial of our redemption, O Father, in this sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving. Recalling his death, resurrection, and ascension, we offer you these gifts.


Sanctify them by your Holy Spirit to be for your people the Body and Blood of your Son, the holy food and drink of new and unending life in him. Sanctify us also that we may faithfully receive this holy Sacrament, and serve you in unity, constancy, and peace; and at the last day bring us with all your saints into the joy of your eternal kingdom.


All this we ask through your Son Jesus Christ: By him, and with him, and in him, in the unity of the Holy Spirit all honor and glory is yours, Almighty Father, now and forever. AMEN.



The Lord’s Prayer

[BCP, p. 364]


And now, as our Savior Christ has taught us, we are bold to say,


Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy Name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever and ever. Amen.



The Fraction Anthems

[BCP, p. 364, 407]


Alleluia! Christ our Passover is sacrificed for us!

Therefore let us keep the feast! Alleluia!


This Far By Faith #36:

O Lamb of God, you take away the sin of the world;

have mercy and grant us peace,

we pray, O Lamb of God.


[Words: Traditional. Music: Grayson Warren Brown; arr. Larry Adams, Copyright © 1979 Grayson Warren Brown. All rights reserved.]


Thanks be to God who gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ!

The Gifts of God for the people of God!



AAHH #686 / LEV #152: Let Us Break Bread Together


1 Let us break bread together on our knees, (on our knees,)

Let us break bread together on our knees, (on our knees,)


REFRAIN:

When I fall on my knees,

with my face to the rising sun,

O Lord have mercy on me, on me.


2 Let us drink wine together on our knees, (on our knees,)

Let us drink wine together on our knees (on our knees,) [REFRAIN]


3 Let us praise God together on our knees, (on our knees,)

Let us praise God together on our knees, (on our knees,) [REFRAIN]


[Words: Traditional, Public Domain. Music: Negro Spiritual, Public Domain; arr. Jimmie Abbington © 2000 GIA Publications, Inc. Reprinted with permission under ONE LICENSE #95817. All rights reserved.]



The Post-Communion Prayer

[BCP, p. 498]


Let us pray.


Almighty God, we thank you that in your great love you have fed us with the spiritual food and drink of the Body and Blood of your Son Jesus Christ, and have given us a foretaste of your heavenly banquet. Grant that this Sacrament may be to us a comfort in affliction, and a pledge of our inheritance in that kingdom where there is no death, neither sorrow nor crying, but the fullness of joy with all your saints; through Jesus Christ our Savior. Amen.



Eulogies



Poem: “Don't” by Nicole Howell


Don't spend too much time in mourning. Tears are for the sad. I left to be with Jesus, and this should make you glad. Don't waste your hours grieving. No need to feel distress. I'm tired of life's frustrations, and had to get some rest. Don't ver yourself with questions or try to reason why. Life for me had ended; it was time to die. Don't lose the love I gave you: feed it with your care. Grow it with devotion and spread it everywhere. Don't fret because my leaving came in such a way. We'll have another meeting on God's Eternal Day!



Hymn: Take My Life and Let It Be

[The Hymnal for Worship and Celebration, #379]


1 Take my life and let it be

consecrated, Lord, to thee;

take my moments and my days -

Let them flow in ceaseless praise,

Let them flow in ceaseless praise.


2 Take my hands and let them move

at the impulse of thy love;

take my feet and let them be

swift and beautiful for Thee,

Swift and beautiful for Thee.


3 Take my voice and let me sing

always, only, for my King;

take my lips and let them be

Filled with messages from Thee,

Filled with messages from thee.


4 Take my silver and my gold -

not a mite would I withhold;

take my intellect and use

ev'ry pow'r as Thou shalt choose,

Ev'ry pow'r as Thou shalt choose.


5 Take my will and make it thine -

it shall be no longer mine;

Take my heart - it is thine own,

it shall be Thy royal throne,

It shall be Thy royal throne.


6 Take my love - my Lord, I pour

at thy feet its treasure store;

take myself - and I will be

Ever, only, all for Thee,

Ever, only, all for thee.


[Words: Frances Ridley Havergal, Public Domain. Music: Hollingside, John Bacchus Dykes, Public Domain. Reprinted with permission under ONE LICENSE #97292. All rights reserved.]



The Commendation

[BCP, p. 499]


Give rest, O Christ, to your servant with your saints, where sorrow and pain are no more, neither sighing, but life everlasting.


You only are immortal, the creator and maker of mankind; and we are mortal, formed of the earth, and to earth shall we return. For so did you ordain when you created me, saying, "You are dust, and to dust you shall return." All of us go down to the dust; yet even at the grave we make our song: Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia.


Give rest, O Christ, to your servant with your saints, where sorrow and pain are no more, neither sighing, but life everlasting.


Into your hands, O merciful Savior, we commend your servant, Bette. Acknowledge, we humbly beseech you, a sheep of your own fold, a lamb of your own flock, a sinner of your own redeeming. Receive her into the arms of your mercy, into the blessed rest of everlasting peace, and into the glorious company of the saints in light. Amen.



The Blessing of the People

[Adapted from The Book of Occasional Services 2018, p. 9]


The God of peace, who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus Christ, the great Shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you perfect in every good work to do God's will, working in you that which is well-pleasing in God's sight; and the blessing of God Almighty, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, be among you, and remain with you always. Amen.



The Dismissal

[BCP, p. 366]


Let us go forth in the name of Christ! Alleluia! Alleluia!

Thanks be to God! Alleluia! Alleluia!




Permissions and Credits: This service is reproduced from The Book of Common Prayer 1979 (BCP), Enriching Our Worship 1 (EOW1), The Hymnal 1982 (Hymn), Lift Every Voice and Sing II: An African American Hymnal (LEV), and other sources cited. Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture readings are from the New Revised Standard Version (NRSV) of the Bible.

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